Motherhood: All love begins and ends there!
As we approach Mother’s Day, I can’t help but think that being a mother has been the most rewarding experience in my life thus far. After having my son, I would often say, “Now, I can fully understand the love that Christ has for me.” It’s a love that is inexplicable, a love that is not always deserving, a love that goes above and beyond and bends the rules to make things happen when they seem impossible. While on this wild roller coaster ride called parenting, I have learned to experience each and every ride and embrace every turn, loop, hoop, twist and roll. With each jaunt, lessons have been learned. And as a mother I am grateful for my son’s growth.
My well advised teachings have included some of the following pieces of encouragement:
- If you can’t lead, make sure you are following the person going in the right direction. While my son might not consider himself a leader, it’s safe to say he is not a follower. My son is a “I’m just minding my own business” type of guy. He is not one to try to influence others to do the right thing when they are being mischievous; but he’s wise enough to understand the phrase “guilty by association” and knows to remove himself from situations that can have a devastating impact on him.
- Don’t make the same mistake twice. The first time my son received a second punishment for a repeated offense we had to have a talk. I stated to him, “Son, don’t get a whipping for the same thing twice.” If it was wrong the first time and there were consequences, there are going to be consequences the second, third and fourth time.
- Displaying good manners is a must and chivalry is not dead. While it’s important to speak to people when you cross paths with them, take the time to really acknowledge them by looking at them. Open the door for a female if you see her approaching. Say “please” and “thank you”. Offer genuine compliments to people.
- Learn who you are, what you enjoy doing and do it. have your own identity. Being a first time mother, I thought every waking moment had to be spent with my son. Soon, I realized he would grow up and I would have to figure out who I was. We’ve learned to share moments together while having our own existence away from each other.
- No one will love you like your mama (parents). This was one of the hardest things for my son to learn. We would try to guide him and he would quietly and respectfully rebel. It was obvious he had tuned us out. After years of having outsiders tell him the same things we were trying to tell him, he grew tired of listening to the record on repeat and started trusting us. I know my son has no doubt about my love for him and he now understands my love is a guiding force for my decision making.
- Respect and discipline are key. You don’t get to do what you want to do. There are rules to follow. My son is not required to agree with everything an adult says but he is required to disagree respectfully. He knows some battles are for me to fight and there are times when he is encouraged to speak up for himself. The only requirement is that it be done tastefully.
- Support each other. It goes a long way. I’m a very supportive parent which equates to me being a very tired parent. But time and time again, I will go to the moon and back to be there for my son. It is so fulfilling to see that support reciprocated. My son cleans my classroom. asks about my day, lets me take naps in peace, etc. Our support might not look the same but he understands the importance of us encouraging and supporting each other however and whenever we can.
While a mother’s work is never done, it is a job that keeps on giving. My son is truly the best gift God has given me while here on earth.