Kindness – the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate

Growing up I was taught to be kind to others. We were told to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. We learned to turn the other cheek. We were groomed to not give in to people’s antics and give them the power to shift who we were and who we were striving to be. “Don’t give them the power to anger you.”, they said. “Kill them with kindness.” But, is kindness really the answer to everything?

When thinking of kindness and the acts associated with being kind, the one thing that is left out is that kindness requires you to do favors and be one of selflessness. Constantly being kind is draining and it can turn you into a “yes ma’am/sir” type of person when you would really want to be a, “HELL NO!” type of gal.

There is power in kindness. Being kind has the ability to inspire others. Kindness has been shown to increase self-esteem, empathy and compassion. But kindness can be seen as a sign of weakness. It’s a gift that is often exploited. Takers will take as long as givers give. And in the end, one’s kindness is easily taken for granted.

People that are kind rarely ask for help because they’re always helping others. Being kind often takes away your time and resources, and you can’t properly take care of yourself mentally or physically. More often than not, you end up burnt out.

So is it worth putting your own health in jeopardy in an effort to care for others. Is your self-worth attached to your willingness to be caring and considerate? Is it a necessity to feel needed? Why is being kind so important? If I take care of me and I’m not being ill-mannered towards you, is that not enough? Let’s start by being kind to ourselves so we can honestly and sincerely become more loving and affectionate towards others. Let’s learn to respond to others out of love instead of obligation.